It is so bad! SO SO SO BAD! I am by far distracted. Oh and I cant say ANYTHING of intellect right now, it is rather funny (from where I am standing) and somewhat irritating to everyone else... oops! Oh well!
The only circus around right now is in my head!
No, NO, you should be stressing about assignments and study and revision and the "break" in a few days...
But laughing is WAY more fun!
I dont care, you need good grades...
You know I stopped caring about that a while ago right?
Pfft, LOSER.
Nah, YOURE the LOSER!
Whatever!
Talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity, arguing with yourself is the second... talking to inanimate objects is the third...
2/3 aint bad! XD
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
The epic day of nothingness!
Everyone has been tired and stressed and generally over it, so we thought it might be fun to misch into town for the day and just have a bit of a day off.
So we did, and we sprayed perfume and laughed loudly and ate vast amounts of junk food and it was entirely AWESOME!
We then came home and had dinner by the fire.
I am subsequently V. tired!
So we did, and we sprayed perfume and laughed loudly and ate vast amounts of junk food and it was entirely AWESOME!
We then came home and had dinner by the fire.
I am subsequently V. tired!
Friday, August 20, 2010
Life is...
Laughing at the little things
Cute, fluffy animals (I am allowed to say this, I am a Zoologist!!! XD)
Good friends
Warm beds
Learning
Understanding
Dreaming
♥
I realised today that my notes are MY notes... thus anyone who gets them will either get joy from seeing the diagrams, or get entirely frustrated... Oh well, I am going to hope for the former!!!
I also realised that I have far better self control than I once thought, and once faced with a 2 faced shit, I was able to walk on by and bide my time.
I also nearly fell asleep EPICALLY in class, so so embarrassing!!!!
Small things make me happy, and I like being happy. I will always shove any feelings of tiredness, stress or sadness as far back as they go and play up the good in my day. It may be unhealthy, but meh! If it gets you through the day, then why not!!!
Cute, fluffy animals (I am allowed to say this, I am a Zoologist!!! XD)
Good friends
Warm beds
Learning
Understanding
Dreaming
♥
I realised today that my notes are MY notes... thus anyone who gets them will either get joy from seeing the diagrams, or get entirely frustrated... Oh well, I am going to hope for the former!!!
I also realised that I have far better self control than I once thought, and once faced with a 2 faced shit, I was able to walk on by and bide my time.
I also nearly fell asleep EPICALLY in class, so so embarrassing!!!!
Small things make me happy, and I like being happy. I will always shove any feelings of tiredness, stress or sadness as far back as they go and play up the good in my day. It may be unhealthy, but meh! If it gets you through the day, then why not!!!
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Tired
I am tired, bloody tired actually. So I feel like a bad person when I can not hold a coherent conversation. I feel worse when people assume that I am mad at them, when I am not. When I am just tired, and angry at myself. I feel bad that people take things personally, and assume it is there fault that I am quiet. I am more than capable of following a conversation, but just not starting one. I feel a bit saddened when a good friend does not have the decency to spark up a conversation, but rather leaves you in the lurch and forcing you to choose between a long, slow walk home in awkward silence, or a slightly shorter walk home while 'ditching' the other person, entirely unintentionally just based on walking speeds.
I dont like pointless conversations afterwards that go in circles.
I am a bad person, I really really am!!
I do however, like when cats interrupt angry conversations by trying to climb up your leg. =3
I dont like pointless conversations afterwards that go in circles.
I am a bad person, I really really am!!
I do however, like when cats interrupt angry conversations by trying to climb up your leg. =3
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Tuesday
I love S2, I really, REALLY do.
Sarcasm is wasted online...
Off to complete/ start revision... atleast I have a light bulb, so I HAVE to get up early tomorrow. woohoo!
Monday, August 16, 2010
Somehow it is already 8pm
I feel violated! Where did the day go? Why did I not manage anything productive..? Why are the mendel lectures not yet online... so many questions, so few answers!!
For the record, I am tired. Not, fall asleep at my desk tired, because I have drank large amounts of black coffee and taken some caffeine pills. But mentally I am so so tired, drained I suppose you might say. Null and void. It is a numbing experience. I suppose it is better than feeling stressed or down, but I have been down more than up lately so now I think I am just on a Plato. Which is fine, but it just feels weird. I am used to being stressed to buggary, or upset... not this strange in between thing that Ive got going on. I guess because so much has gone awry this semester that nothing else can shock me.
Break in a few weeks... not sure if I am keen for it or not anymore, in mixed minds about it. Which does not help.
Tomorrow the landlord is coming around for a "flat inspection" oh goody!!! I do not believe I have defaced the walls or floor at all... but we shall see I guess...
My flatmate was talking about friendship just before, it interested me. She has been told to be more proactive when it comes to finding friends... I was mildly offended. I am an incredibly shy person, people look at me strangely when I say this... I dont talk often to randoms... unfortunately once I do start talking to you.. it is very hard to shut me up... Anyway, I am not pro-active when it comes to meeting people. I talk to people in practical classes, and have friends to sit with in my lectures. I have relationships with people that stand the test of time... I still have friends from primary school!!! I keep up with the important people from WGHS and from uni last year. I guess my one philosophy is to always be yourself, as cliche as that is. If someone doesnt like you for you, then that is their problem. You should not change yourself to fit in. I can smile at this because I never have. I am true to myself, like it or not. I am NOT perfect, not even close... more like as far as you can get from it, but at least I am true to who I am. Sure I made a HUGE effort upon first moving down to Dunedin to be more outgoing, but I was still me... and it only took a day (not even that!) for me to break back down and carry on being me. There are aspects that you may tone down, or up so as not to offend people (see sarcasm and cutting remarks) but I will always be the blunt, sarcastic one who says the first thing the comes to mind. And the one who laughs embarassingly loudly with little disregard for public eye. For some reason people still stick with me. So I must be doing something right? But being proactive... no, no thanks!!!
For the record, I am tired. Not, fall asleep at my desk tired, because I have drank large amounts of black coffee and taken some caffeine pills. But mentally I am so so tired, drained I suppose you might say. Null and void. It is a numbing experience. I suppose it is better than feeling stressed or down, but I have been down more than up lately so now I think I am just on a Plato. Which is fine, but it just feels weird. I am used to being stressed to buggary, or upset... not this strange in between thing that Ive got going on. I guess because so much has gone awry this semester that nothing else can shock me.
Break in a few weeks... not sure if I am keen for it or not anymore, in mixed minds about it. Which does not help.
Tomorrow the landlord is coming around for a "flat inspection" oh goody!!! I do not believe I have defaced the walls or floor at all... but we shall see I guess...
My flatmate was talking about friendship just before, it interested me. She has been told to be more proactive when it comes to finding friends... I was mildly offended. I am an incredibly shy person, people look at me strangely when I say this... I dont talk often to randoms... unfortunately once I do start talking to you.. it is very hard to shut me up... Anyway, I am not pro-active when it comes to meeting people. I talk to people in practical classes, and have friends to sit with in my lectures. I have relationships with people that stand the test of time... I still have friends from primary school!!! I keep up with the important people from WGHS and from uni last year. I guess my one philosophy is to always be yourself, as cliche as that is. If someone doesnt like you for you, then that is their problem. You should not change yourself to fit in. I can smile at this because I never have. I am true to myself, like it or not. I am NOT perfect, not even close... more like as far as you can get from it, but at least I am true to who I am. Sure I made a HUGE effort upon first moving down to Dunedin to be more outgoing, but I was still me... and it only took a day (not even that!) for me to break back down and carry on being me. There are aspects that you may tone down, or up so as not to offend people (see sarcasm and cutting remarks) but I will always be the blunt, sarcastic one who says the first thing the comes to mind. And the one who laughs embarassingly loudly with little disregard for public eye. For some reason people still stick with me. So I must be doing something right? But being proactive... no, no thanks!!!
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Valproic Acid
I have typed that word so many times today, and yet my assignment is not finished. Which means another late night... woohoo!
I slept in today... it was epic. Sleep ins are rare for me, because I feel guilty and then lazy. So 2am - til 7... then 8... then 9... it was good.
Managed to upset my flatmate this evening, which was not cool... most likely made worse by said flatmate walking past whilst I was telling the other flatmate of my failings... XD I cant help it that I worry about things and then need another persons perspective...
"PEN-NAYH!!! where are you penny?!"
I slept in today... it was epic. Sleep ins are rare for me, because I feel guilty and then lazy. So 2am - til 7... then 8... then 9... it was good.
Managed to upset my flatmate this evening, which was not cool... most likely made worse by said flatmate walking past whilst I was telling the other flatmate of my failings... XD I cant help it that I worry about things and then need another persons perspective...
"PEN-NAYH!!! where are you penny?!"
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